What I Gained at The Bridge
At The Bridge, I gained a lot out of the program that made me a better person than I was before. Before I came to The Bridge, I was crying out for help, but my family thought I was crying wolf, and felt that I was blowing things out of proportion. I knew that if I could just get one chance to get myself together, and get my priorities straight, I would be successful.
I have been suffering from low self-esteem for over 12 years, and I never worked on trying to find ways to make the situation better. I just let it build up until I went on a road to destruction. Over the last couple of years, I made people depressed, angry, and have all kinds of negative feelings, so that they would feel how I felt. I let people down a lot of times because I wanted them to see what people did to me. I remember as a child when my family use to try to make me happy, but I always pushed them away. Coming to The Bridge helped me gain knowledge about my low self-esteem issues. After a couple of months, I applied the skills The Bridge taught me to my life, and now I am able to have fun, accept compliments, and control my mood swings.
Thankfully, God gave me another chance and placed me in The Bridge to show the world anything can be done. I am grateful for life thanks to The Bridge.
I noticed I had an addiction to drugs and alcohol before I came to The Bridge, but I wasn’t ready to stop having fun without drugs and alcohol. On the streets, I was out of control. The drugs and alcohol took over my life in less than six months. I would come in the house late, skip school, and lie to my family. One night. I was out with friends, and we were all intoxicated. My friend snatched a women’s pocket book, and I was the only one who got into trouble. Right after that incident, my family didn’t trust me anymore. They thought I was going to get lost in the streets. There were plenty of nights when I was high or drunk where I wanted God to just come take me off this Earth. I felt as though I didn’t belong here. Thankfully, God gave me another chance and placed me in The Bridge to show the world anything can be done. I am grateful for life thanks to The Bridge.
In the serenity prayer, we ask God to grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change and have the courage to change the things we can and the wisdom to know the difference. To be honest, before I came to The Bridge, I didn’t have patience, respect, and I didn’t believe in myself to turn my life around. I saw myself disrespecting my family as revenge seeking behavior because I wasn’t home for five years, and when I was home, I always was in and out of hospitals. My family background is inconsistent. My grandmother and my mother relationship is poor because of situations in the past they never let go, and they still hold grudges against each other. My mother’s relationship with her nine children is in stable condition because she still hangs around us, and shows us love. My other family members are not that supportive, but some of them really care. Coming to The Bridge, I found myself beating myself up everyday until I started talking to my therapist and peers. After a couple of months passed by. I took on my issues and accepted the fact I can’t make my family perfect, but I can control myself, and my actions. I think the most important family issue I am willing to engage in, and make the best of is taking care of my son Sabir Nyeem Gaskins. My child’s mother gave birth to Sabir October 9th 2009. There are some issues we have to settle, and I am handling this because I want to break my family cycle.
Being at The Bridge was a blessing. The Bridge brought happiness, joy, and stress, but overall I achieved a lot. I am currently working on my self-esteem issues by taking one day at a time, and just being happy. I gained knowledge about my addiction, and I am willing to lose my desire of alcohol, and drugs because I went down that road, and I don’t want to go through that experience again. Now when I go on home passes, I talk to my family more, and I feel more comfortable around them. I owe a special thanks to The Bridge and its staff.